Practicum 1 - part 1

Assalamualaikum

Alright. so, i have started my practicum phase 1 on 11th of june. and i have no idea about it. hahahaha. padahal, harini dah hari ke-3. so, there are few issues happen.

ok, first. i dont know why, but i have a bad feelings when i entered this school. eh, no. even before practicum started. hahahahah. dia macam mana ek, bukan bad feelings. sebenarnya i serabut. tu jee. i think a lot. no, i overthink. huhuhu. i think, this kind of thing happens because i am not ready for practicum. so, i pray a lot to Allah. sebab i sampai tak boleh tido since i jejak ipba. u know, we need a lot of energy during practicum (to shout :p)

i dont know. i berat hati jee kat sekolah ni. i don't know why i am very reluctant to stay at this school. sumpah, sekolah ni okay, cikgu-cikgu dia sangat welcoming, baik, helpful. budak2 pun okay. but, I still dont know why this kind of feeling even exist. maybe because I am not ready. sebab semua benda macam tiba2. sumpah, semua datang serentak and you have to all of it at once.

actually, kami tak cukup waktu mengajar. we supposed to have 10 periods per week, but we only got 7 periods. and after negotiation, the GB agreed to give us 9 periods to teach. but, still tak cukup. so, we met unit prakticum and discuss about it. they said that we are going to change school to SK Petaling 2. at that time, i feel like macam beban kat bahu tu hilangh. i tak tau kenapa. series. i feel like, ok, this new school it might be okay for me. i macam boleh serasi dengan sekolah baru ni. in shaa Allah. buttttt, today, we just got the news that we are going to stay at this school. ipgm bagi pelepasan sebab ni kes khas. so, yeah. masa dapat tau tu, i macam "wth. i dah mentally and physically prepared nak keluar dari sekolah ni." hahahahah

i tiba2 serabut balik. then, i teringat my parent's advice, "istighfar, selawat banyak2, mintak dipermudahkan semua." i serabut gila without any reason. i ws my mom and my dad, minta diorang doakan i. mintak hilangkan semua benda2 negative ni. and, Allah helps me T_______T

masa i dapat berita kena stay kat sekolah ni, i tengah relief kelas darjah 1. i dengan ummie serabut sangat, so, kami paksa depa tido sebab tamau laa nanti duk lepas geram kat depa tiba2. hahahha. setengah jam jugak laa diorang tido. XD and, after that, i teman ummie relief kelas darjah 3. time, tu, kami marah depa sebab diorang masuk kelas lambat. duk pi kat kedai buku beli apa dia tah. memang kena laa kann. and after that, i masuk kelas darjah 2. class yang akan i handle for this 3 months. time tu, sumpah serabut. but, Allah nak tunjuk. when i entered that class, they were so excited. "Cikgu imah! Cikgu Imah!" i macam, "awwww.."

time tu, ada syasya relief kelas tu. so, saja laa masuk. dahtu, syasya ajak main game yes or no. game ni, kalau jawapan diorang yes, they have to run at the front of the class, and if their answer is no, they have to go to the back of the classroom. bila syasya tanya, "Do you love miss iemah?" and they are all running towards me and hug me. i macam "awww...ya Allah. apa dosa budak2 ni." i macam reflect balik, "why i want to change school when i already have these bunch of cute (Nakal gila) kids. dah laa cikgu diorang duk tinggai depa berapa bulan dahh. takkan i nak jadi macam cikgu tu." at that time, i realised yang, i have been selfish for the past three days. and now, i feel all of the unnecessary burden yang i duk overthink tu, it is not supposed to be there. i have to love the kids and teaching. because, afterall, i am a TEACHER. 

Terima kasih Allah for lessen my burden, for get rid all of these negative vibes. and tahnk you for still giving me opportunity to fix my mistake. :')

Thank you for reading this entry!